Monday, 11 February 2013

Chastity, tease and denial

Tease and denial is something that seems to work really well for us. T and D, along with keeping Paul in a chastity device is probably the basis of our Femdom dynamic. Because the reality is that we have lives to lead, and not every moment of every day involves a BDSM type interaction between us. We have kids, a business to run, clients to talk to and lives to get on with. But insisting that Paul wears a chastity device and teasing him on a regular basis ensures that the special connection that we have is never far from the surface.

Another nice little under the surface touch is that I make Paul wear women's panties most days. I brought him a pack of three panties from Primark and he does look very cute in them. He was a bit squirmy the first time that I had him put them on and model them for me, but now its quite normal for him and I think he has got used to it.

The chastity device he wears is made from stainless steel and locks behind his balls. I had him buy some special paint and spray it pink. It does look cute. 

In the evenings, after the kids have gone to bed we will sit together and watch TV. I will have Paul take off his trousers, pull down his panties and I will lightly play with his cock and balls through his CB, using my nails to stroke the shaft of his cock through the bars of the cage and tickling his balls with my fingernails. Or I may make him remove his CB so I have more access. Once he is all hot and bothered I will make him kneel on the floor, remove my socks and worship my feet. I can feel the passion in his kisses and I love the feeling of his warm breath on my feet. Sometimes while his down there, I will play with myself and have a lovely orgasm. Once I am done, its back in the cage for him and we snuggle on the sofa.

I have noticed that when I deny him orgasms and tease him like this, he seems to ooze devotion to me. I know it sounds funny, but I can virtually smell it coming out of the pores of his skin. There is a mushy-ness about him which I love. Especially as he is not the worlds most mush guy the in daily life.

I'm still getting used to this blog business. I will upload a couple of photos for you. I'm excited when I see that you have left a comment and when I can see that people all over the world are reading this blog. So please do leave a comment for me.

I also want to push my little business, so do visit my website and if you want to hear my voice there are some recordings on there of me reading out some sexy stories that we wrote together, based on the things that we enjoy doing together.


  1. "I have noticed that when I deny him orgasms and tease him like this, he seems to ooze devotion to me. I know it sounds funny, but I can virtually smell it coming out of the pores of his skin. There is a mushy-ness about him which I love. Especially as he is not the worlds most mush guy the in daily life."

    I am the same way, although I wish it weren't so. When my Queen dominates me and denies me orgasm, I am like a March hare, horny as can be and I am a better husband. Here's what I mean:

    If she allows me orgasm, I will probably oversleep the next day and blow off my workouts.

    If she gives me a nice T&D session, I will likely workout (I often think about becoming hotter for her arousal when I lift) and I feel compelled to do nice things for her. I am more likely to do the dishes (which is "her" chore), and have often brought her a coffee treat. I will often give her cash (she seldom has any).

    I liken it to going back to when we were dating. I put my best face forward, HOPING she will give me release, but not being sure if she will. If she is giving me a handjob, I don't know if it will end in a satisfying ejaculation, she will stop and tell me to go to bed, or if she ruin the orgasm. Not knowing my fate (and therefore not taking it for granted) makes it very exciting to me, and results in me being a better husband.

    Like I said, I wish it weren't so. When I come, I can get a little grumpy afterwards, and my focus on the courtship behaviors decreases. I am nervous because she has no incentive to grant me a release! She likes me better when I am horny :S

  2. Hi loves

    Thank you for sharing this with us.

    There's definitely a change in the dynamic and Paul's behavior once he is allowed to come. We have been together a long time, 13 years and so I have seen this many times.

    However, I do not like it at all and so once Paul has come he will go straight back in his CB (we often have adult time during the day when the kids are at school as we work from home) and he will be given lots of household chores to do. He is absolutely not allowed to slack off once he has come and as I am aware of the potential for him to be less submissive once he has had release I crank things up a bit, and be extra bossy with him.

    Paul gets to come about once a month or so and I think that this is just right. When he does come he is still desperate for more anyway.

    So he may have the feelings that you describe, I know he does in fact but he is absolutely not allowed to let his standards drop.

    I relish your feedback and comments. I'm always excited when I see that someone has left a comment so thanks again

    Zoe x

  3. I only have a small amount of experience with chastity, and I must say that it was similar to how you have both described it. It made me very focussed on my Domme, and I think the description of "courtship behaviour" is great. In lots of species the males have evolved to compete for females, and it's almost as though that aspect is assisted by chastiity. Rather than relax when a long term relationship has been achieved and the "chase" is over, it keeps a males attention on staying in her good books. That seems to be healthy for both partners, and a lot of fun, provided it's managed well. I'm not sure if "the chase is always better than the kill" is literally true, but I do know that the chase is a lot of fun, and anything which helps a male keep his standards up must be a good thing.

    The focus on you which chastity has "oozing" out of him is a lovely description. I loved feeling like that while I was in chastity, that focus on her as the centre of the universe was a wonderful feeling from the subs point of view aswell.